ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Randomize
