after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize
