Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
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