I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
She needs sedatives and a leash
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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