Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
