It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
