i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize