...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
false alarm. still invincible.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
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