Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Randomize
