there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I fill condoms, not promises.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I pour the whiskey from now on
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
