David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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