eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
