I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Randomize
