it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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