this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Randomize
