playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Randomize
