Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
