Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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