i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
