so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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