Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
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