How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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