About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Randomize
