Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
