yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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