I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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