Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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