So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
