Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Randomize
