This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
