So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
My dick has a subreddit
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
