omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
