I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize