Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
