Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Just cropdusted the office
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
