No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
this will be a night to untag.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
