absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
