the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Randomize
