I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
Randomize
