Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
