i love accidental penises.
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Randomize