when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Randomize
