everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
