I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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