i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Randomize
