so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
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