Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
