ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
