fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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