Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Randomize
